Lay out a variety of toys on the floor. See suggestions of toys at the end of this document. You can use your child’s favourite everyday toys. The toys do not need to be what you think of as ‘educational toys’, they should be toys which your child loves to play with.

Start: Then invite your child to sit down and see what they choose to play with.

Verbally track the child’s play (describe what you see) to show that you are noticing what they are doing:

SAY (for example) : “You’ve chosen that..”

“Oh you’re showing me”

“You’re putting that on there”

So you are verbalising what they are doing and their ideas and thoughts.

Also use sounds such as —“Hmm…” to convey interest and involvement,

Verbally tracking your child’s play is a way of letting your child know that you are paying close attention and that you are interested and involved:

“You’re filling that all the way to the top,” “You’ve decided you want to paint next,” or “You’ve got them all lined up just how you want them.” “You’re setting things out just as you want”,

When your child asks you to do something, verbalise what they have asked you to do:

“You want me to put that on,” “Hmmm…,” or “I wonder what’s going to happen…”, “You want me to stack these just as high as yours.”

Use whisper technique (co-conspirators) when child wants you to play a role: “What should I say?” or “What happens next?”

Verbally reflecting children’s feelings helps them feel understood and communicates your acceptance of their feelings and needs. Simple sentences of feelings during play:

“feeling excited”- when they pick up a toy and look excited/smile.

“Feels fun” “that’s funny”,

“Feeling frustrated”- when they are trying to put something together and it’s not easy, “feeling surprised”, - when they start a noisy toy..

“feeling strong”- when they manage to open something, a character toy rescues another toy, the child pretends to be their favourite hero.

“Feeling proud of (the tower you built),” - when the child has achieved something.

“feels nice on your hands,” or ”feels funny/sticky on your hands”- if playing with playdough.

Talk to your child about what they are trying to do:

“Really concentrating”, ”Trying really hard”, “Figuring it out” “You’ve got a plan for how you’re going to set those up,” “You know just how you want that to be,” “You did it!” “You figured it out!”

Show your child when they need your help, that they can still problem solve,

For example, if the child wants you to open a glue stick, ask them “where shall I put my hands?”, “What do I do next?” “Show me what to do next?” Child may gesture what you should do next (here you can ask questions).

5 minutes before the end tell your child they have 5 minutes – ideally show with a sand timer but don’t worry if you don’t have one.

After 5 minutes tell they child that special playtime has finished for today.

If child wants longer say: “I know you really want to play longer but special play time has finished for today” –although tempting don’t carry on but repeat to the child that it’s over just for today and you can do it again tomorrow.

It is best if the child is not asked to help pack up the toys this is because it’s a special time with no pressures or expectations. If this is difficult for you to do ask the child to put just one toy away.

Consistent boundaries/limits create a structure for a safe and predictable environment for children. Boundary/Limit setting provides an opportunity for your child to develop self-control and self-responsibility.

If the child does something you do not want, set a boundary when the behaviour occurs:

Using a calm, patient, yet firm voice, say:

Acknowledge behaviour: “I know you want to throw the sand”

Boundary/ limit: “The sand is not for throwing”

Alternative: “What else can you throw?”or “you can throw the ball”

Another example:

Acknowledge behaviour: “I know you want to paint on the floor”

Boundary/limit: “the floor is not for painting”.

(Give an alternative) “you can paint on the paper” or “what do we paint on?”

If child shows behaviour in which they are hurting themselves or you, say:

“I know you are cross”

“I am not for hitting”/ “(Name) is not for hitting”

Repeat: “I know you are cross”

(Don’t suggest an alternative if not appropriate)

Whenever a child needs support with feelings make sure you acknowledge their feelings and intentions of the occurred behaviour as you would in the limit setting above:

Showing the child that their intentions and feelings are recognised supports in their self-regulation. So, when the child is upset and needs support/comfort make reference to how the child is feeling and what their feelings are communicating:

-“I know you’re frustrated/cross/sad”, “I know you want that toy..” “I know you want to be first in the line and I can see you are sad”.

If the child knows that they are understood they will respond to support and understand the boundary set.

Follow with boundary/limit and then alternative (if appropriate).

“I know you want that toy and are feeling sad, (name..) has the toy now, you can have it next/after sand timer”.

Toys in special playtime: Any toys which your child likes and plays with:

These are only suggestions below and to show you the toys can be the everyday ones which your child uses at home and do not need to be ‘educational’:

Toy cars and other transport- diggers, aeroplane, helicopter, lego, duplo, small action figures, small character figures- peppa pig, princesses, play mobil, soldiers, barbies, farm yard, animals, cuddly toys, doctors kit, dolly with nappies and wet wipes, sand tray, playdough, puppets, pop up toys, telephone, sensory toys such as squeezy balls, light up toys.